some things are better left unsaid but its said.

I know ive said it many times this time im moving on and not looking back im unhappy .im happy yes to an extent w.this man then he puts me down tells me what i can and cant do or what i shouldnt wear and to get dressed up juss to go to his house but what im really .really unhappy is the person that ive become..the whole point that im jumping through hoops trying to please this man, trying to be what he wants me to be .look and act..i do more for him then i do for myself and in the end hes still unhappy .i hold back on alot of things that i want to do and with me hes never had that problem he does what he wants and doesnt ask for my opinion yet alone doesnt care about what i think .so why should i listen to him??did he ask me what i thought about him gettin tattoos?if approve w.him gettin a haircut?ive always accepted him from his apperance because when u love someone u dont care about their looks .looks are skin deep. when ur in a relationship u have to decide for both.right?wrong.u do what u want if u want to look a certain way or wear what u want .get a tattoo u do it because u want too .im tired of going by someone elses rules and not being able to live my life as an adult .im young.there is alot i want to do with no one giving me restrictions i want to be my own boss .i want to even take a dance class without feelin like i shouldnt be doing it because im told im not allowed ..im tired of jumping through hoops trying to make someone happy but i get nothing out it.i said looks are

Skin deep then personality kicks in but when personality constantly puts you down because ur not what they want in their eyes why r u still there?im unhappy with myself for lettin a man do what he wants with me and completely forget about what i want for myself .ive been in a relationship for so long that i forgot how to stand for myself and make my own choices .everything i had and felt for this man didnt juss go away its not him its me .for letting it get to this for letting a man do what he wants and control me .its my own fault

I READ IT FROM A BOOK

Its important for both parties to do what they can to make the relationship work.but i also think there,s value in knowing when every avenue has been explored and its time to part. Know when to walk away;know when to run

Amarga Navidad:Te la Dedico

Acaba de una vez, de un solo golpe.
Porque quieres matarme poco a poco
Sí va ha llegar el día en que me abandones
prefiero corazón que sea ésta noche.

Diciembre me gustó pa' que te vayas,
que sea tu cruel adios mi navidad,
no quiero comenzar el año nuevo,
con este mismo amor, que me hace tanto mal.

Y ya después, que pasen muchas cosas,
que éstes arrepentido, que tengas mucho miedo,
vas a saber, que aquello que dejaste,
fue lo que mas quisiste, pero ya no hay remedio.

Diciembre me gustó pa' que te vayas,
que sea tu cruel adios mi navidad,
no quiero comenzar el año nuevo,
con este mismo amor, que me hace tanto mal.

Y ya después, que pasen muchas cosas,
que éstes arrepentido, que tengas mucho miedo,
vas a saber, que aquello que dejaste,
fue lo que mas quisiste, pero ya no hay remedio.

Diciembre me gustó pa' que te vayas,
que sea tu cruel adios mi navidad,
no quiero comenzar el año nuevo,
con este mismo amor, que me hace tanto mal.

Ideas!!!

so ive been thinking so hard about gettin this undercut ive really been wanting for a few months now heres something im really looking at rightnow just cause i dont want to live thinkin i shouldve done it .hair grows back and i can always look back and say i did that .for those who dont know what an undercut is.its really a shaved head or a shorter length of hair under your normal length some ppl go balls out with this look rihanna is a good example and cassie rocked it but im not going all in i juss want a quarter section of my hair here are a few pictures .of what im looking for .u might think what the fuck is rosy thinkin?!!shes going britney or what the fuck!!haha na not balls out bald head .

let me introduce you to melody ehsani shes a designer from clothing to jewelry for hip hop icons and celebrities i love her and if u havent heard of her i really recommend you look into what shes all about

alot of celebs have done this and have their own style on it im going more off of melody's and lala's

Im so hurt .im crying like a child why do i set myself up for failure i hate being with this guy when he cant bring me around to his family this shit hurts me so fuckn much that he cant give me my spot with them ever since this happend im juss the girl at night when noones home .i hate that he doesnt give me this spot as his girlfriend i hate that he goes out and doesnt ask me he juss does it because hes not in a position to ask with me in his eyes he doesnt have too .he doesnt have too ask me he doesnt evn have to bring me .then seriously why is he with me .what we have is nothing and i gotta stop fakin it and thinkin its good cause its not its never gonna get better .i want more outta this then he does i dont plan to be the girl that he sees at night when he comes from la and open at his convenience like a damn liqour store i want to be more then that i want to be part of the family but he wants me no where near them i need to move on im only gonna end up lonely in the end with it being harder to leave .

..And He gave all of us gifts

One of many lifes greatest gifts are so simple, yet mean so much.hahah cheesy?but really i dont remember the last time i actually picked up a rose and smelled it.we take advantage of the things around us ,we are so busy maintaining with work ,school ,kids,that we dont have time to stop and appreciate whats given to us

I actually juss got off of work and as soon as i got off i cruised around through imperial beach listening to my sisters cd of rihanna i can so relate to one of her songs i think its called fading i didnt want to get off the car ...sadly i passed by his house n hes out ..he came from la yesterday and still hasnt bothered to call its been a week already ..anyways anyone in my situation .in my shoes.listen to that song

La Buena Vida

Life struggle

at this point of my life im lost and dont have anyone to go to but my family and some good friends i am living my life and focusin on work and school for now i have interest in what you have already read im copin with this breakup through photography and writing and reading .i used to handle my problems drinking but when the hangover hits reality does too and it hurts more to fake it and act like everything is cool when it really aint .i lost someone very important to me and i have alot to learn about love and everything that comes with it.at this point im not lookin for anything or anyone, no one can fill me with what has been lost. only myself , by doing me.only me .imma do what makes me happy and what interest me .this is a really hard time in my life y me pongo a pensar how can this be over?how long is this going to last?this feeling?i dont mean to sound like an unstable emotional person i cant control what im feeling.god be with me in times likes these i dont have as much faith as i should sometimes i even doubt you but i wasnt raised that way i juss have a hard time believin theres someone higher thats good.way to good. this is my first blog entry and where i really speak and talk about what going on with me i dont even talk about religion in my interest im blabbin now ...but anyways thanks to everyone who has been there you know exactly who you are and your friendship means alot to me

Oh man ...how i miss my boyfriend

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